Lately, our house has been chaotic. Some of it is the natural chaos of having 3 kids under 6, but most of it is the unnatural chaos that comes with neurological gaps and high levels of anxiety. When this happens, though, I can't help but start looking at how God is showing up.
Monday we had an appointment not made by us with Buddy's old doctor. She passed him up because she only works with kids under 5. It was a very sad day when we said goodbye to her, as she has been one of the only professionals to see Buddy as he is, instead of the calm facade he puts on especially in doctors' offices. When she heard the report of how he is doing...she took him back. I am in awe of God's grace in this situation. She has also been preemptive and wants to meet with his whole team on order to get everyone, including the school, on the same page. This is unheard of. We are so grateful that God stepped in and is providing amazing care for our incredible son!
In the midst of the chaos I have developed a new hobby. It's mindless enough that once I get going I don't have to think about what I'm doing. It's interesting enough to keep me dreaming and planning. Knitting, or crocheting, you see, needs more of my senses and time where I am kid free - especially the patterns I love to work on. Writing, for me, requires quiet. But! Paper making, my new love, is keeping my hands busy while my eyes and mind can stay on the kids!
It's such a picture to me, too, though of how God works in our lives. The first step of recycling paper into new sheets is selecting the medium. God picks us out of a pile and gets to work on us.Then you break down the paper into smaller pieces. God takes apart our heart and washes us clean.
The next steps are painful, but necessary. The paper mush gets drowned in water then put in a blender of food processor. God puts us in situations to completely break us down to get us ready for the use that is best suited for us. Sometimes, that is completely different from what we were before Jesus, sometimes it's very similar.
After being ground into pulp, the slurry gets dumped into a large vat and more water is poured on it to bring up the water level in order to cover the screen that will be dipped.
Here comes the cool part - the papermaker gets the screen and deckle (the frame that holds the paper pulp to the screen which determines the size of the paper) ready then submerses it in the murky water. Swishing the screen around to get the consistency just right, the paper maker then pulls the screen and deckle out of the water. Now you can either pour off the water, or let it drip through the screen or start the process over again. The paper doesn't always cooperate, and can be holey or to thick or too thin or just not useful for the task it's destined for. Same goes for us, doesn't it? Often times we resist what God is doing because we don't know the end-goal, so back into the bucket we go.
When everything is just right, the screen and deckle come out and get placed on a towel, then the deckle is lifted, revealing a very fragile and new piece of paper. Next, a piece of felt is placed directly on the paper and smooshed to adhere to it to protect it and to help it keep its shape - I feel like this is like other believers that God puts in our path to help shape and direct us in the way He would have us go.
After a second or two, the paper maker flips the whole thing over and starts to press all of the water out of the soaked paper. It takes a lot of pressure and many different sponges to get all of the water out. After enough water is pressed, the screen is taken away. Now the paper only has one more step before it can be used - drying.
Drying can take what seems like forever. There are things you can do to speed up the process, like using a dehydrator, or a fan, or even the oven, but left on its own, the paper can take days, or even a full week to dry.
After the 'forever' of waiting, the paper is ready. It's such a parallel process, isn't it? I'm so glad God takes the old and makes us new!
How have you seen God lately?
xo,
J
Soli Deo Gloria!
Thursday, April 30, 2015
Wednesday, April 22, 2015
Earth Day and Stewardship
It's been a while, hasn't it? My life has been UP...and DOOOOOOWN lately. So much chaos, so many different things that have kept our entire family crazy!
BUT! I've been able to keep up with my resolutions - the ones of reading 52 books this year and memorizing the book of James. While I'm WAY ahead in the book department (32 of 52 complete!...will post a list soon) I'm still in the first 20 verses of James. It's SO slow going, but I've found an app that is really helping me! Hooray!
The book I am currently reading is called Follow by Floyd McClung. It is so good. It's also one of those ones that hits you in the stomach because it has so much in it that is convicting. Yesterday's chapter was on faithfulness, and this is where this post has sprung from.
Lately, God has been working on my heart in stewardship and being faithful in the small things. I've told you before how hard I find it to do housework or things like that - and in my life, those are the small things. I can get SO caught up in big projects or dreams, that I completely lose sight of my own house.
Being faithful and diligent in keeping my house clean and my clothes laundered enables me to have people over without having the giant RUSH to clean up right before the doorbell rings. It also cuts down on fights with the kids because they know where their toys or water bottles are. Overall, it promotes peace.
Being faithful in praying for people I've said I would has really been cool, too. I've been starting to write down requests and keep track of the answers. God is so cool. Even with our 'pithy' requests, God is kind. I've also seen bigger things get put into motion. Certain people have made godly decisions, others have started reading their Bibles more, and even my kids are excited about praying.
Being faithful in the small things really prepares you for the big things of the world. This is where I can tie this in to Earth Day. Think about it - if we took the time to recycle and reuse what we have our own environmental impact would diminish. This includes meal planning to eliminate (or at least cut down on) food waste, patching clothes, or grouping errands to save fuel.
Being faithful overall is tough. I cannot do it on my own - it is part of the fruit of the Holy Spirit. I am so grateful that He is involved, or else I would be entirely overwhelmed and a failure.
How have you been challenged lately? With what do you need to be faithful?
XO,
J
Soli Deo Gloria
BUT! I've been able to keep up with my resolutions - the ones of reading 52 books this year and memorizing the book of James. While I'm WAY ahead in the book department (32 of 52 complete!...will post a list soon) I'm still in the first 20 verses of James. It's SO slow going, but I've found an app that is really helping me! Hooray!
The book I am currently reading is called Follow by Floyd McClung. It is so good. It's also one of those ones that hits you in the stomach because it has so much in it that is convicting. Yesterday's chapter was on faithfulness, and this is where this post has sprung from.
Lately, God has been working on my heart in stewardship and being faithful in the small things. I've told you before how hard I find it to do housework or things like that - and in my life, those are the small things. I can get SO caught up in big projects or dreams, that I completely lose sight of my own house.
Being faithful and diligent in keeping my house clean and my clothes laundered enables me to have people over without having the giant RUSH to clean up right before the doorbell rings. It also cuts down on fights with the kids because they know where their toys or water bottles are. Overall, it promotes peace.
Being faithful in praying for people I've said I would has really been cool, too. I've been starting to write down requests and keep track of the answers. God is so cool. Even with our 'pithy' requests, God is kind. I've also seen bigger things get put into motion. Certain people have made godly decisions, others have started reading their Bibles more, and even my kids are excited about praying.
Being faithful in the small things really prepares you for the big things of the world. This is where I can tie this in to Earth Day. Think about it - if we took the time to recycle and reuse what we have our own environmental impact would diminish. This includes meal planning to eliminate (or at least cut down on) food waste, patching clothes, or grouping errands to save fuel.
Being faithful overall is tough. I cannot do it on my own - it is part of the fruit of the Holy Spirit. I am so grateful that He is involved, or else I would be entirely overwhelmed and a failure.
How have you been challenged lately? With what do you need to be faithful?
XO,
J
Soli Deo Gloria
Tuesday, April 7, 2015
In Pain and Beauty
This post has been rolling around in my head for quite some time, so if it seems jumbled, let's just go with it got taken out of the dryer at the wrong time.
There are so many examples of what I want to try and say that I feel silly rehashing it. But....let me try to rehash it in a way that is personal to me.
In brokenness there can be a beauty that does not compare to anything else. That beauty also caters to the soul, not just the flesh.
On the worst days at my house, the ones I'm covered in puke or have been punched or bitten, I try to surround myself with beauty to try and take the sting out of the day. While it isn't the brokenness that causes the beauty, it's the juxtaposition that creates a heightened meaning. For instance, when one of us wakes up on the wrong side of the bed, I reach for my most beautiful mug: a china mug with gorgeous roses. While it doesn't chase the grumpies away, it does bolster resilience for a few hours.
I just finished a book called The Elegance of a Hedgehog. While it's main theme is not about what I'm talking about - it does touch on it. It was a beautiful book that fed my soul while chaos surrounded me. I suggest you look it up and dig in to it. Not only is the language stellar the whole book just made me smile and laugh out loud. (especially when she finally visits her neighbor!)
One of my favourite examples of brokenness causing beauty is found during the death of Christ. Since we just passed Easter, I thought it fitting to highlight it for you today. In the temple, separating the world from the Holy of Holies - the place where man would go to meet with God at the mercy seat to offer a blood sacrifice - there was a curtain. It wasn't just your average run of the mill curtain that could be pushed away. It was thick. It was HEAVY. It was HUGE - I'm talking 60 feet by 30 feet, not to mention it was about 4 inches thick. ....Now THAT is a curtain. It was also beautiful. It was woven in scarlet and blue by people who were specifically gifted to do so.
Thing is, it was 'just' beautiful. The thing that makes it heart-achingly, astoundingly glorious is that it was ripped from top to bottom. In and of itself, a ripped curtain would not be lovely, it would be broken, but that brokenness is infused with symbolism and meaning. That stunning tear signified the lack of barrier between God and man. The death coinciding with that rip opened the way for Man to come before God without the ritual sacrifice, but instead, covered in the blood of the Lamb.
That broken veil is beautiful - more so than when it was whole. It offers us the chance to not just survive, but live.
What beauty in brokenness have you seen?
XO,
J
Soli Deo Gloria
There are so many examples of what I want to try and say that I feel silly rehashing it. But....let me try to rehash it in a way that is personal to me.
In brokenness there can be a beauty that does not compare to anything else. That beauty also caters to the soul, not just the flesh.
On the worst days at my house, the ones I'm covered in puke or have been punched or bitten, I try to surround myself with beauty to try and take the sting out of the day. While it isn't the brokenness that causes the beauty, it's the juxtaposition that creates a heightened meaning. For instance, when one of us wakes up on the wrong side of the bed, I reach for my most beautiful mug: a china mug with gorgeous roses. While it doesn't chase the grumpies away, it does bolster resilience for a few hours.
I just finished a book called The Elegance of a Hedgehog. While it's main theme is not about what I'm talking about - it does touch on it. It was a beautiful book that fed my soul while chaos surrounded me. I suggest you look it up and dig in to it. Not only is the language stellar the whole book just made me smile and laugh out loud. (especially when she finally visits her neighbor!)
One of my favourite examples of brokenness causing beauty is found during the death of Christ. Since we just passed Easter, I thought it fitting to highlight it for you today. In the temple, separating the world from the Holy of Holies - the place where man would go to meet with God at the mercy seat to offer a blood sacrifice - there was a curtain. It wasn't just your average run of the mill curtain that could be pushed away. It was thick. It was HEAVY. It was HUGE - I'm talking 60 feet by 30 feet, not to mention it was about 4 inches thick. ....Now THAT is a curtain. It was also beautiful. It was woven in scarlet and blue by people who were specifically gifted to do so.
Thing is, it was 'just' beautiful. The thing that makes it heart-achingly, astoundingly glorious is that it was ripped from top to bottom. In and of itself, a ripped curtain would not be lovely, it would be broken, but that brokenness is infused with symbolism and meaning. That stunning tear signified the lack of barrier between God and man. The death coinciding with that rip opened the way for Man to come before God without the ritual sacrifice, but instead, covered in the blood of the Lamb.
That broken veil is beautiful - more so than when it was whole. It offers us the chance to not just survive, but live.
What beauty in brokenness have you seen?
XO,
J
Soli Deo Gloria
Thursday, March 12, 2015
Being Rooted
A few things have lead me to this post today. Mostly, it's been my daily devotions coupled with life happenings.
Persistent sin sucks. You can let it define you and drag you through the mire, or you can confess it and let Jesus lift you over that same mire. The thing is, many people think confessing is the last step. It really is not. It might not be the first step either. My point is that it is a STEP in the right direction.
Repenting is a HUGE step that, I feel, gets glossed over. 'We fall into the trap of thinking 'But I already admitted I was guilty...do I really have to change?' The answer is YES! A resounding YES! BUT! We must be rooted in God before that change can occur.
If we just change directions it is likely that direction, while maybe better, isn't the right one. Without reading God's directions, talking to wise godly people who have been in your place before, or even praying, you might as well be a sailing ship without a compass on a cloudy night.
For me, often, I make good changes, but neglect to get to the root of the sin. Like raspberry vines, even though I cut down the visible bush, the untouched root system will spring up alive and well and produce its fruit.
Sometimes we have to go through a really ugly uprooting phase in order to oust the sin completely. Digging up an entire line of roots doesn't sound fun, does it? And that's why, I'm afraid, the majority of us 'conquer' the same sin time and again. We rarely get down to the nitty gritty. We are afraid of the open, vulnerable hole that will be left. We are unsure of what will be planted in its place.
Here's what we can do instead of worrying: fertilize the soil. Rid it completely of weeds. Search out anything that might hinder good fruit and GET RID OF IT! Build a fence. Ask others to help set up a guard around that fence. and so on the list can go.
Let the Holy Spirit plant His fruit. Watch it grow. Let Him prune you into a lovely garden that others are drawn to because of HIS handiwork! Remember, though to be firmly rooted in Him and His Word.
What are you growing in the garden of your life?
XO,
J
Soli Deo Gloria
Persistent sin sucks. You can let it define you and drag you through the mire, or you can confess it and let Jesus lift you over that same mire. The thing is, many people think confessing is the last step. It really is not. It might not be the first step either. My point is that it is a STEP in the right direction.
Repenting is a HUGE step that, I feel, gets glossed over. 'We fall into the trap of thinking 'But I already admitted I was guilty...do I really have to change?' The answer is YES! A resounding YES! BUT! We must be rooted in God before that change can occur.
If we just change directions it is likely that direction, while maybe better, isn't the right one. Without reading God's directions, talking to wise godly people who have been in your place before, or even praying, you might as well be a sailing ship without a compass on a cloudy night.
For me, often, I make good changes, but neglect to get to the root of the sin. Like raspberry vines, even though I cut down the visible bush, the untouched root system will spring up alive and well and produce its fruit.
Sometimes we have to go through a really ugly uprooting phase in order to oust the sin completely. Digging up an entire line of roots doesn't sound fun, does it? And that's why, I'm afraid, the majority of us 'conquer' the same sin time and again. We rarely get down to the nitty gritty. We are afraid of the open, vulnerable hole that will be left. We are unsure of what will be planted in its place.
Here's what we can do instead of worrying: fertilize the soil. Rid it completely of weeds. Search out anything that might hinder good fruit and GET RID OF IT! Build a fence. Ask others to help set up a guard around that fence. and so on the list can go.
Let the Holy Spirit plant His fruit. Watch it grow. Let Him prune you into a lovely garden that others are drawn to because of HIS handiwork! Remember, though to be firmly rooted in Him and His Word.
What are you growing in the garden of your life?
XO,
J
Soli Deo Gloria
Monday, March 2, 2015
Trusting When in a High and Stormy Gale
Lately, music and lyrics of different songs have really been hitting me at a soul level. There is a common theme through all of them : Trusting in a God who is bigger than our circumstance/pain/world/fear/everything.
Even right now, going through my head is On Christ the Solid Rock I Stand:
When Darkness veils his lovely face
I Trust in his unfailing Grace
In every high and stormy gale
my anchor holds within the veil
On Christ the Solid Rock I stand
all other ground is sinking sand, all other ground is sinking sand
...That verse especially encapsulates what I've been feeling. I don't understand what's been going on, the darkness has been hiding or at least obscuring God's goodness, but I don't need to fear because I can trust in His UNFAILING grace.
JJ Heller has a song called Who You are the chorus goes like this:
Sometimes I don't know, I don't know what you're doing
I don't know, I don't know what you're doing,
BUT! I know who You are.
Even right now, going through my head is On Christ the Solid Rock I Stand:
When Darkness veils his lovely face
I Trust in his unfailing Grace
In every high and stormy gale
my anchor holds within the veil
On Christ the Solid Rock I stand
all other ground is sinking sand, all other ground is sinking sand
...That verse especially encapsulates what I've been feeling. I don't understand what's been going on, the darkness has been hiding or at least obscuring God's goodness, but I don't need to fear because I can trust in His UNFAILING grace.
JJ Heller has a song called Who You are the chorus goes like this:
Sometimes I don't know, I don't know what you're doing
I don't know, I don't know what you're doing,
BUT! I know who You are.
THAT is it! That is the theme of these songs, I really have no idea WHY God is giving us the life He is, but I know WHO He is.
He who put the stars in
place pours out wrath on those who do not turn from sin.
He who so loved the world
sent the LION of Judah.
His love is magnificent, so
wholly terrifying we fall on our faces from the sheer pureness of it,
and we use the word 'love' so flippantly and in such a way it
demeans, degrades and defiles. God is love and we have only a small
glimpse, through a dark glass of what love really means.
I believe in God. I believe
He is powerful enough to bring us into situations like Jonah -where
we have absolutely no inclination towards the people He loves. We
don't understand his fierce and earnest desire for those we have
deemed unreachable or tainted. We run from His commands to what we
believe will be easier and find ourselves in a pit. A stinky, bottom
of the ocean pit of utter lonliness, chaos and despair. We often
mislabel our disobedience as a lesson God is teaching and then call
out for Him to save us. In His everlasting and awe-inspiring grace,
he has the fish spit us out. Our pit has done nothing to change our
hearts, we still have no desire to follow God, but we do, realizing
in some aspect that our disobedience causes us pain. We technically
follow his commands, with no joy, nor excitement. We sit back and see
how people respond to God's unfailing and incomprehensible love and
we moan and complain. God did not need Jonah to reach the people of
Nineveh, but He chose to use this prophet in a way I'm sure would not
be forgotten.
I love that the end of Jonah
is an open ending. There is no happy resolution for Jonah. God has
had his task satisfied and the people of Nineveh have repented, but
Jonah has not. It's a perfect picture for us today. God is not about
me. God is about Him. So often, though, God invites us into glorious
tasks that are not about us and we get upset, and when we are utterly
miserable in our failure, He invites us again. His love is
relentless. It is not God's fault Jonah is miserable. Who wouldn't
want to be part of finding the cure to an incurable disease, or a
party celebrating the overthrowing of an inhumane regime? Us. Jonah.
We get so caught up in what we want or don't want to do, that we lose
sight of the important, the immortal, the immeasurably joyous thing
God is asking us to be part of.
Jonah, like us, has (or had)
a choice. He did not have to stay there under 'his' dead vine and
bemoan his wondrous circumstances. He could have gotten up and taken
part of the redemptive revelry brought about by God's unfathomable
mercy for the Ninevites. We, the redeemed, must remember this mercy
was used to draw us into the Kingdom.
His mercy is so beautiful it
leaves us speechless, but with a need to cry out with the rocks. It
shakes us to the core and upends our selves. Grace, mercy's partner,
is also wondrous that we have no earthly words to describe the
wholeness is produces.
His kindness leads us to
repentance, yet a majority, like the Israelite heritage we have,
forget. Giants stand in our way. The Red sea, the river Jordan, the
lack of food, the lack of water, the inane, the basic, the
underwhelming needs of the body stacked with the overwhelming
mistrust of the Infinite God who has promised, proven, and provided
all good things.
We who ate the forbidden
fruit and revel in our filth and muck. Who glory in cheating the
system and garnering treasures that rot not only psychically but
spiritually. Who prostitute our bodies to abuse after abuse of
gluttony or starvation, not to mention the hedonistic highs of drink,
sex, drug, and vice. Who justify anger and harsh words. Who lead
children into 'harmless' lies to cover shame. Who set up idol after
idol and make sacrifices to the gods of health, wealth, and self. We
gloat in our shame. We flaunt our hideous malignancy and waltz before
the throne of the Almighty with requests for parking spaces, blessing
of sinful relationships, and dastardly vows.
We point to Elijah's burnout
and use it for justification of our own, neglecting to remember the
circumstances surrounding his time under the broom tree. We look to
Hagar's request and think our own, sin laden petition will be
granted, and are angered and scathing in our response when God turns
down the unglorifying postulation. We read about Job and feel we are
the same in blamelessness, but forsake the warnings of Malachi. We
cherry pick through the God's Holy Word to justify our existence,
when what we really need to do is grab hold of the sanctification and
subsequent justification provided only in and through the Messiah.
I want nothing to do with
the pithy god who is only worth turning to when disaster strikes. I
want nothing to do with the god who is above all thinking of me. I
want nothing to do with mishandling, misquoting, and misusing the
precious Book God has given to us. I want no part of easy,
self-satisfying worship.
I want to be overwhelmed. I
want to be upended. I want to be put in the crucible. I want to be
washed in the blood of the Lion-Lamb and take on His fearful
holiness. I want to live in and because of His power. I want to out
sing the rest of creation with praise too wonderful for even angels
to comprehend. I want to stand and be counted. I want to live and die
for Him who died for holiness, wholeness, completion, and glory. Most
of all, I want Him.
How about you? Want have your anchor hold within THAT veil?
XO,
J
Soli Deo Glorie
Tuesday, February 24, 2015
Practicing for the Recital of Life
Over the last few weeks God has been working on my heart. It's been a wonderfully healing kind of pain. I've told you before about how I stink at doing housework and a majority of domestic tasks. I've chalked it up to so many different things ranging from forgetfulness to pain in my knee to little hands that get in the way. Some were legitimate reasons, others legitimate excuses, but really, it came down to something a little more..how shall I say it nicely? ....oh wait, let's not sugarcoat this: SINFUL!
Let's give a few muscles to the skeleton of a story I just presented to you.
Over the last few weeks/months different videos, articles, conversations, and so on have come my way that have highlighted the need for mastering basic skills before taking on the final project. Let me expound with a musical example:
A pianist does not play scales at a recital, they play a masterpiece by a maestro who also did not play scales and count time in front of the masses. The hours and hours of practicing scales and simple pieces gave them a foundation to build harder pieces of music upon. People like Jazz musicians probably know this the best. They not only have to know a piece, but how the different notes interplay with each other inside and out so that when their turn for improvisation comes up it produces wonderful resolving dissonances and harmonies! If these musicians did not have a basic understanding of music, but simply memorized large compositions, they would not sound as beautiful, they would sound mechanical or even worse.
Same goes for housework, or anything, really. You have to have the basics down before you have a showstopping worthy performance...or daily life.
Here comes my conviction. I love...LOVE hosting people. I love cooking and serving tea and cakes. I love making things that make people feel special and loved. I love it when people feel free to pop in unannounced and just have tea and visiting with me. (that is hard given Buddy's particular anxiety's, but on school days....totally different story!) But, the thing with unannounced guests is that my house is often painfully untidy. S make take that pronouncement a bit further and call it messy.
About three weeks ago, I spontaneously invited someone over for supper. It had been a chaotic week, so things were a little worse than normal, but S and I blitzed a tiny bit before she got here and at least swept the crumbs out of the way (literally, they weren't swept up, but swept over to the side of the room!! AH!). We still had dishes from a day or two prior sitting in the sink and so on. She enjoyed supper with us, and I even persuaded her to stay overnight! It's a very Turkish thing to do - ask your guests to stay over instead of having them leave. We made samosas and hung out all the next day too, and she stayed another night.
...the thing is, she helped me clean. While she enjoyed doing it, and it was a huge blessing for me to have a hand doing it, it made me realize that my mess, even when hastily contained affects people in my home. I need to practice the scales of my home before I can go out for my recital of welcoming.
I used to think I was good at hospitality. Now I realize that my 'performance' has been a little flat. I need to practice the basics and get them down pat before people really feel not only welcome, but comfortable in my home.
This conviction branches out in so many other directions too - things like writing - you need to know spelling and grammar before you can write a novel. You need to know how to cut up vegetables before you can make ratatoullie. ..and so on.
Most of all, I think this has hit me (besides my housework) in the idea of God department. Do I know His love? Do I know his grace? ...etc. or do I "just" dabble in highfalutin theology that I think has foundation, but don't really know it? Is the foundation solid? Back to the awe-inspiring basic.
How about you? Does this hit home at all? In what way?
Straining ahead,
J
Soli Deo Gloria
Let's give a few muscles to the skeleton of a story I just presented to you.
Over the last few weeks/months different videos, articles, conversations, and so on have come my way that have highlighted the need for mastering basic skills before taking on the final project. Let me expound with a musical example:
A pianist does not play scales at a recital, they play a masterpiece by a maestro who also did not play scales and count time in front of the masses. The hours and hours of practicing scales and simple pieces gave them a foundation to build harder pieces of music upon. People like Jazz musicians probably know this the best. They not only have to know a piece, but how the different notes interplay with each other inside and out so that when their turn for improvisation comes up it produces wonderful resolving dissonances and harmonies! If these musicians did not have a basic understanding of music, but simply memorized large compositions, they would not sound as beautiful, they would sound mechanical or even worse.
Same goes for housework, or anything, really. You have to have the basics down before you have a showstopping worthy performance...or daily life.
Here comes my conviction. I love...LOVE hosting people. I love cooking and serving tea and cakes. I love making things that make people feel special and loved. I love it when people feel free to pop in unannounced and just have tea and visiting with me. (that is hard given Buddy's particular anxiety's, but on school days....totally different story!) But, the thing with unannounced guests is that my house is often painfully untidy. S make take that pronouncement a bit further and call it messy.
About three weeks ago, I spontaneously invited someone over for supper. It had been a chaotic week, so things were a little worse than normal, but S and I blitzed a tiny bit before she got here and at least swept the crumbs out of the way (literally, they weren't swept up, but swept over to the side of the room!! AH!). We still had dishes from a day or two prior sitting in the sink and so on. She enjoyed supper with us, and I even persuaded her to stay overnight! It's a very Turkish thing to do - ask your guests to stay over instead of having them leave. We made samosas and hung out all the next day too, and she stayed another night.
...the thing is, she helped me clean. While she enjoyed doing it, and it was a huge blessing for me to have a hand doing it, it made me realize that my mess, even when hastily contained affects people in my home. I need to practice the scales of my home before I can go out for my recital of welcoming.
I used to think I was good at hospitality. Now I realize that my 'performance' has been a little flat. I need to practice the basics and get them down pat before people really feel not only welcome, but comfortable in my home.
This conviction branches out in so many other directions too - things like writing - you need to know spelling and grammar before you can write a novel. You need to know how to cut up vegetables before you can make ratatoullie. ..and so on.
Most of all, I think this has hit me (besides my housework) in the idea of God department. Do I know His love? Do I know his grace? ...etc. or do I "just" dabble in highfalutin theology that I think has foundation, but don't really know it? Is the foundation solid? Back to the awe-inspiring basic.
How about you? Does this hit home at all? In what way?
Straining ahead,
J
Soli Deo Gloria
Monday, February 9, 2015
A Cultured post...with updates!
'Member how I made a second batch of sauerkraut? 'Member how excited I was that it was two heads of garden fresh cabbage: one green on red?
Well....let's just say it was a big ol' flop. My excitement over it is only rivaled, now, by the disappointment of the first bite. It...was...gross. Maybe I should make that GROSS. My kids ate a bite or two and so did S, but that was it. We have decided to toss out this latest culture. Us toss something? I promise you, it really is THAT gross.
Where did we go wrong?
I think I let the water level get too low once. I put it in a lass jar, but didn't put it in a super dark place. I mixed the cabbages. I...made a bunch of mistakes.
It is super sad to me. Especially because I had no idea until that first wretched taste. Months of culturing amounted to a jar full of yuck. Guess I really should invest in one of those lovely enamel crocks for my next adventure in food cultures!
Anyway! On to the more exciting updates!
I've put aside my gorgeous wool that is currently being tangled into a lacey sweater, and started a different raglan sweater from yarn my parents got me for Christmas. Again, they gave me a sweater that requires some assemblage. Hm...good thing I love doing it! It's a simple repeating pattern. I made it more complicated because I made the pattern smaller, and it was NOT written to do so. I finagled my way around it, and now am about half-way through! Hooray!
My finished book list for my New Year's resolution is growing substantionally! Yesterday alone I finished TWO! Hooray! I'm starting another today (Overwhelmed: winning the war against worry by Perry Noble). We'll see how it goes. I have few others started as well - one really complicated (Moby Dick) one a bit less, but still a classic (Man in the Iron Mask) and then a more easy to read one when I need down time for my brain (Watching the Tree Limbs by Mary Demuth). It's not too hard for me to keep all of them going at once. It keeps me interested in all of them, really.
As for my own book: I have writer's block. ugh. It's more like I have too high of standards and I'm not living up to them right now. I want depth and strong characters, but I'm ending up with tedious fluff. I'm hoping to put out a few pages in the next week or so, or at least add more of the ideas and then flesh them out, but we'll see. I've also been sidetracked by the other million ideas in my head and have pushed out 4 short stories. Okay, not four complete ones, but 2 complete and 2 half (or more) done. I have more ideas crowding into my brain even now. I probably would have finished more, but our computer is still out of commission and this dinosaur of a computer drives me batty for writing. S's computer is compatible with dropbox, so I'll be able to do more when he gets home in the evenings.
Memorizing James: this has been uber slow going for me. I don't know why. It just is. I think, again, the standards I'm setting are getting in the way. You see, I don't really want to 'just' memorize. I want to be passionately involved with the verses, not passively checking off the 'done' box that it is secure in my brain. Sigh. I have about the first ten verses, I think.
Overall, I think progress is being made everywhere. How are you doing in sticking to your resolutions, if you made any?
XO,
J
Soli Deo Gloria!
Well....let's just say it was a big ol' flop. My excitement over it is only rivaled, now, by the disappointment of the first bite. It...was...gross. Maybe I should make that GROSS. My kids ate a bite or two and so did S, but that was it. We have decided to toss out this latest culture. Us toss something? I promise you, it really is THAT gross.
Where did we go wrong?
I think I let the water level get too low once. I put it in a lass jar, but didn't put it in a super dark place. I mixed the cabbages. I...made a bunch of mistakes.
It is super sad to me. Especially because I had no idea until that first wretched taste. Months of culturing amounted to a jar full of yuck. Guess I really should invest in one of those lovely enamel crocks for my next adventure in food cultures!
Anyway! On to the more exciting updates!
I've put aside my gorgeous wool that is currently being tangled into a lacey sweater, and started a different raglan sweater from yarn my parents got me for Christmas. Again, they gave me a sweater that requires some assemblage. Hm...good thing I love doing it! It's a simple repeating pattern. I made it more complicated because I made the pattern smaller, and it was NOT written to do so. I finagled my way around it, and now am about half-way through! Hooray!
My finished book list for my New Year's resolution is growing substantionally! Yesterday alone I finished TWO! Hooray! I'm starting another today (Overwhelmed: winning the war against worry by Perry Noble). We'll see how it goes. I have few others started as well - one really complicated (Moby Dick) one a bit less, but still a classic (Man in the Iron Mask) and then a more easy to read one when I need down time for my brain (Watching the Tree Limbs by Mary Demuth). It's not too hard for me to keep all of them going at once. It keeps me interested in all of them, really.
As for my own book: I have writer's block. ugh. It's more like I have too high of standards and I'm not living up to them right now. I want depth and strong characters, but I'm ending up with tedious fluff. I'm hoping to put out a few pages in the next week or so, or at least add more of the ideas and then flesh them out, but we'll see. I've also been sidetracked by the other million ideas in my head and have pushed out 4 short stories. Okay, not four complete ones, but 2 complete and 2 half (or more) done. I have more ideas crowding into my brain even now. I probably would have finished more, but our computer is still out of commission and this dinosaur of a computer drives me batty for writing. S's computer is compatible with dropbox, so I'll be able to do more when he gets home in the evenings.
Memorizing James: this has been uber slow going for me. I don't know why. It just is. I think, again, the standards I'm setting are getting in the way. You see, I don't really want to 'just' memorize. I want to be passionately involved with the verses, not passively checking off the 'done' box that it is secure in my brain. Sigh. I have about the first ten verses, I think.
Overall, I think progress is being made everywhere. How are you doing in sticking to your resolutions, if you made any?
XO,
J
Soli Deo Gloria!
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