So, my last post was about diving in with both feet into a new adventure of starting as a stylist for a newer direct sales company.
....I love it. I have been having so much fun with all of it. I love to learn, and this has been a feasting ground for new information!
Thing is, though, like with most of my hobbies and passions, and other both feet first endeavors, I am in over my head. Or maybe, more likely, I'm in over our families heads. The first few weeks were fueled by adrenaline and SO...MUCH...EXCITEMENT! While I still am passionate and thrilled about the majority of this new business, the helium is slowly coming out of the balloon, and I'm being brought back down to earth.
I'm starting to realize that I DO have to schedule and actually *work* (not just play) to be successful. It's good to have external goals again, and this brings me to my next life thing: bullet journaling and day planning.
I was the kid in high school and college who actually used the provided agenda...and loved it! I would write in EVERY assignment and put in 'fake' deadlines about a week or two prior to the actual due date so I could go back with fresh eyes to critique and improve my work....yes, I was *THAT* kid.
Fast forward to now...when I don't have deadlines or any kind of structure except for the daily visual schedule for my Little Buddy. I kind of drift hither and yon....I have SOME things to look forward to and plan for, but the most part...no real life structure.
BUT NOW!!! I can plan and structure again! I have deadlines and external goals and and and! Without a pre-organized planner with fun stuff in it, I was kind of at a loss of how to get myself organized...and then...I fell into the pinterest hole of planning! Oh My Word! There is SO MUCH stuff!
I got myself a day planner from Moleskine and I've already put in months in advance stuff. I'm also gearing up to start a second one that tracks Little Buddy's moods and different cycles over the months. And a prayer journal....and and and!
I had forgotten about how much I love planning. hoooray!
How do YOU plan?
xo,
J
Soli Deo Gloria
Sunday, June 5, 2016
Wednesday, March 16, 2016
Both Feet First
I'm a very black and white kind of person. As I've grown, I've added a few shades of grey (not 50, never 50!), but for the most part, I am pretty black and white.
Now this monochromatic way of seeing things affects how I do or love things. If I believe something...I BELIEVE it, and so act on it. For instance, a few years back I *believed* that our family needed to lower our toxin burden. I went...all..out. We changed our detergents for soaps, I went without shampoo and conditioner, and even began to make our own lotions. Even still those changes have remained, and I'm always working towards reducing unnatural chemical burden for us!
I don't usually moderately like something, I LOVE IT!...and will usually let you know.....again, with the toxic burden stuff - I couldn't keep quiet about it, and I drove my husband fairly batty, so I started a blog, so I could 'talk' my heart out. People could read it...or not.
And so in the last year, I've done a few things by jumping in both feet first. You've read about me making paper, making sauer kraut, practicing penmanship, and calligraphy. You've probably rolled your eyes or chuckled a little bit knowing how almost over-board I'm going. ....or you're all in with me, and I should have you over to write calligraphy in our new hand-made books while we munch of lacto-fermented foods!
Well, my newest endeavor is not a craft. It's not even really 'hands-on'. I've joined the ranks of the home-business world!
Crazy? Maybe. Thing is, I've needed something like this for quite some time. I've lost a bit of perspective and my world was becoming smaller and smaller by the week. My sensory world was collapsing in on itself, and I didn't really have a goal to work towards, in order to get myself back.
While I was taking the necessary steps to reclaim the world as my oyster, it seemed like I was sitting there spinning my wheels. Now, though, I feel like sand got poured under those wheels and I'm actually moving somewhere! Hooray!
It's really by God's grace that it has all worked out like this. Two weeks ago, I had never even known about the company I now work for! In His provision, He has given me the opportunity to not only jump with both feet, but hit the ground running!
Okay, so enough of the mixing of metaphors!
xo,
J
soli deo gloria!
Now this monochromatic way of seeing things affects how I do or love things. If I believe something...I BELIEVE it, and so act on it. For instance, a few years back I *believed* that our family needed to lower our toxin burden. I went...all..out. We changed our detergents for soaps, I went without shampoo and conditioner, and even began to make our own lotions. Even still those changes have remained, and I'm always working towards reducing unnatural chemical burden for us!
I don't usually moderately like something, I LOVE IT!...and will usually let you know.....again, with the toxic burden stuff - I couldn't keep quiet about it, and I drove my husband fairly batty, so I started a blog, so I could 'talk' my heart out. People could read it...or not.
And so in the last year, I've done a few things by jumping in both feet first. You've read about me making paper, making sauer kraut, practicing penmanship, and calligraphy. You've probably rolled your eyes or chuckled a little bit knowing how almost over-board I'm going. ....or you're all in with me, and I should have you over to write calligraphy in our new hand-made books while we munch of lacto-fermented foods!
Well, my newest endeavor is not a craft. It's not even really 'hands-on'. I've joined the ranks of the home-business world!
Crazy? Maybe. Thing is, I've needed something like this for quite some time. I've lost a bit of perspective and my world was becoming smaller and smaller by the week. My sensory world was collapsing in on itself, and I didn't really have a goal to work towards, in order to get myself back.
While I was taking the necessary steps to reclaim the world as my oyster, it seemed like I was sitting there spinning my wheels. Now, though, I feel like sand got poured under those wheels and I'm actually moving somewhere! Hooray!
It's really by God's grace that it has all worked out like this. Two weeks ago, I had never even known about the company I now work for! In His provision, He has given me the opportunity to not only jump with both feet, but hit the ground running!
Okay, so enough of the mixing of metaphors!
xo,
J
soli deo gloria!
Tuesday, February 23, 2016
Not Far From the Tree
Over the last year or so, I've been coming to realize how much my kids are like me. It's strange, in some ways, to step back and just watch these tiny beings spout things that usually come out of your own mouth.
For instance, Little Red has decided she loves holding babies. She's 4. I have pictured memories of holding babies when I was that little. Her face looks like mine. Her grip on the little one looks like mine. It's tremendous!
Little Bird likes to be involved in anything I am doing. She gets in the way and wants to bake or help in the kitchen. She wants to help put things away, or read books with her siblings, or just BE with people. Again, the similarity...uncanny.
My buddy, though, has shown me some things about myself that I didn't even know. In working with him to get himself organized and able to actually make it through each and every day, we have to use a visual schedule, and a whole bunch of cues. We also have to be extremely careful to monitor what kind of activities he's doing for how long, elsewise we are faced with a child who cannot calm down whatsoever until he explodes into a meltdown. In the last little while, I've been confronted with my own need for structure and almost so far as making myself a schedule for each part of my day. It's not that I'll cry uncontrollably if I can't watch MY movie or anything like that, but I do get much more testy, and tend to yell at my kids, or not be able to tolerate simple things, like the smell of supper cooking, or so on and so forth.
I am also learning that if I do anything that triggers my vestibular system, I have to really work to calm myself down again, or else I'm super hyper until I just crash.
Buddy also is calmed down by intellectual activities, creating things, or reading. It's like they poured his brain straight into my brain's mold. (well...maybe not EXACTLY). My mind MUST be stimulated, or I feel like I am off balance, or running in a hundred different directions at once. Without taking time to read, or knit, colour, or read....I'm a mess.
Chips off the old block....all of my kids. My hope is that in all of the similarities, that the ones that they grow into, are the God honoring ones. I know I have so many different flaws and shortcomings. I hope that as they grow, they grow out of those ones.
All of this observation has made me step back. Some of the qualities my kiddos have inherited are just that - inherited; others are learned. I've needed to take a close look at how who I am and what I do plays out in the ripple effect in my kids, and in turn, their kids...and so on. It's staggering to realize the impact one can have on so many. Now, to make sure that impact is becoming....and worthy of copying.
...How do you see yourself in those around YOU?
xo
J
soli deo gloria
For instance, Little Red has decided she loves holding babies. She's 4. I have pictured memories of holding babies when I was that little. Her face looks like mine. Her grip on the little one looks like mine. It's tremendous!
Little Bird likes to be involved in anything I am doing. She gets in the way and wants to bake or help in the kitchen. She wants to help put things away, or read books with her siblings, or just BE with people. Again, the similarity...uncanny.
My buddy, though, has shown me some things about myself that I didn't even know. In working with him to get himself organized and able to actually make it through each and every day, we have to use a visual schedule, and a whole bunch of cues. We also have to be extremely careful to monitor what kind of activities he's doing for how long, elsewise we are faced with a child who cannot calm down whatsoever until he explodes into a meltdown. In the last little while, I've been confronted with my own need for structure and almost so far as making myself a schedule for each part of my day. It's not that I'll cry uncontrollably if I can't watch MY movie or anything like that, but I do get much more testy, and tend to yell at my kids, or not be able to tolerate simple things, like the smell of supper cooking, or so on and so forth.
I am also learning that if I do anything that triggers my vestibular system, I have to really work to calm myself down again, or else I'm super hyper until I just crash.
Buddy also is calmed down by intellectual activities, creating things, or reading. It's like they poured his brain straight into my brain's mold. (well...maybe not EXACTLY). My mind MUST be stimulated, or I feel like I am off balance, or running in a hundred different directions at once. Without taking time to read, or knit, colour, or read....I'm a mess.
Chips off the old block....all of my kids. My hope is that in all of the similarities, that the ones that they grow into, are the God honoring ones. I know I have so many different flaws and shortcomings. I hope that as they grow, they grow out of those ones.
All of this observation has made me step back. Some of the qualities my kiddos have inherited are just that - inherited; others are learned. I've needed to take a close look at how who I am and what I do plays out in the ripple effect in my kids, and in turn, their kids...and so on. It's staggering to realize the impact one can have on so many. Now, to make sure that impact is becoming....and worthy of copying.
...How do you see yourself in those around YOU?
xo
J
soli deo gloria
Thursday, January 28, 2016
China Mug Days
I've been absent from the blogging world. Our family's mental health status is at an all time low, and priorities have been shuffled....and tossed....and shuffled.
I'm back today, but who knows about tomorrow?
Anyway - update about my resolutions from last year:
I gave up on memorizing James around September when things in our life got too hectic and required much more mental energy to be used up. I still want to memorize it at some point, and maybe at a slower rate, but last year, I got about 1 and a half chapters committed to memory.
I DID finish my 52 book 'challenge'. After 52 I stopped keeping official count, but the number reached up, easily, to the 70's. This year our family is not up for a book challenge, so I'm not resolving any kind of numbers.
Resolution for this year: survive the year.
Simple, isn't it? I'm pretty sure God's the one who is going to make sure it happens :)
Onward!
Today is a china mug kind of day. We've had a string of really bad days in our house. The gut wrenching, I'm not sure how I'm going to get out of bed the next morning kind of bad days. We have made it out of bed each day, and we've made it through each day. It's quite something.
I've been learning how to help myself in the midst of the chaos and meltdowns. Beauty fills my soul. It's the old adage of taking time to smell the roses. Some days, beauty surrounds me - the giggles of my girls, the sun in all its glorious prairie sunrise glory, the snow sparkling in the deep cold, my houseplants blooming, the brilliant turn-a-phrase of a particular author, and so on. Other days, beauty is elusive and desperately hard to find. These days I generally have to actively create or search out beauty.
These are my china mug days.
Back when I was in Bible school, my church at home set up an adopt a student program. I was adopted by a lovely older couple who I appreciate dearly. They would send notes and they got me a few Christmas gifts over the years. One year, it was a gorgeous Royal Albert tea set complete with pot, cups, saucers, creamer and sugar bowl. The next it was a set of china coffee mugs in the matching pattern. I had never seen china coffee mugs before. They are delicate and tall. They have a bowled bottom and fluted top. They are designed perfectly to keep the beverage warm for longer periods of time. I was thrilled with them. I still am.
On to today: these mugs are a simple way to bring beauty and a bolstering to my faint soul. I rarely use them on good days - they just seem superfluous. But on not-so-good days, they are a life line...especially when coupled with the Psalms.
What do you do to bring beauty to your days?
XO,
J
soli deo gloria
I'm back today, but who knows about tomorrow?
Anyway - update about my resolutions from last year:
I gave up on memorizing James around September when things in our life got too hectic and required much more mental energy to be used up. I still want to memorize it at some point, and maybe at a slower rate, but last year, I got about 1 and a half chapters committed to memory.
I DID finish my 52 book 'challenge'. After 52 I stopped keeping official count, but the number reached up, easily, to the 70's. This year our family is not up for a book challenge, so I'm not resolving any kind of numbers.
Resolution for this year: survive the year.
Simple, isn't it? I'm pretty sure God's the one who is going to make sure it happens :)
Onward!
Today is a china mug kind of day. We've had a string of really bad days in our house. The gut wrenching, I'm not sure how I'm going to get out of bed the next morning kind of bad days. We have made it out of bed each day, and we've made it through each day. It's quite something.
I've been learning how to help myself in the midst of the chaos and meltdowns. Beauty fills my soul. It's the old adage of taking time to smell the roses. Some days, beauty surrounds me - the giggles of my girls, the sun in all its glorious prairie sunrise glory, the snow sparkling in the deep cold, my houseplants blooming, the brilliant turn-a-phrase of a particular author, and so on. Other days, beauty is elusive and desperately hard to find. These days I generally have to actively create or search out beauty.
These are my china mug days.
Back when I was in Bible school, my church at home set up an adopt a student program. I was adopted by a lovely older couple who I appreciate dearly. They would send notes and they got me a few Christmas gifts over the years. One year, it was a gorgeous Royal Albert tea set complete with pot, cups, saucers, creamer and sugar bowl. The next it was a set of china coffee mugs in the matching pattern. I had never seen china coffee mugs before. They are delicate and tall. They have a bowled bottom and fluted top. They are designed perfectly to keep the beverage warm for longer periods of time. I was thrilled with them. I still am.
On to today: these mugs are a simple way to bring beauty and a bolstering to my faint soul. I rarely use them on good days - they just seem superfluous. But on not-so-good days, they are a life line...especially when coupled with the Psalms.
What do you do to bring beauty to your days?
XO,
J
soli deo gloria
Friday, October 30, 2015
In the Silence
I've been fairly offline for writing lately.
The truth is, I have very little to say that isn't directly linked to how our family is being affected by Buddy's neuro-atypicalness. It's not that I'm completely inward focused, though that is a daily battle, it's more that it is so all-encompasing that it is what my mind focuses on even in 'down' times.
It's things like making sure I have the correct things on our visual schedule, and hoping even those things aren't too much for sensory-sensitive little Man. It's also making sure we have safety procedures in place for the girls should life (or things on the schedule) be too overwhelming.
But! In this silence, I've been writing on paper. Not just writing, but practicing. I got Mastering Copperplate in the mail, along with a nibbed pen and ink. I've been practicing strokes and putting them together to form shaky letters. It's complicated enough that I don't think about strategies, but simple enough that I can supervise my girls playing play-dough or dolls.
This script is kind of like our life. When S and I first got married we knew some of the basic strokes of relationships and family, and we got to practice them before adding more complex elements. Once Buddy was added to the mix with had more things to practice, but there was also a healthy dose of play and give. With both of the girls we added more and more facets and possibilities, making our family even more challenging, but stunning and worth the work. As our family grows (in stature, not in number), the basics are down, the foundation mostly solid (though we do have to go back and practice things like communications), and God is the master penman of our family - adding the flourishes and complexities that, while dazzling to look at, are intricate and painstaking.
I can't wait to see what all of this silence adds up to.
xo,
J
soli deo gloria
Here's some of the process:
The truth is, I have very little to say that isn't directly linked to how our family is being affected by Buddy's neuro-atypicalness. It's not that I'm completely inward focused, though that is a daily battle, it's more that it is so all-encompasing that it is what my mind focuses on even in 'down' times.
It's things like making sure I have the correct things on our visual schedule, and hoping even those things aren't too much for sensory-sensitive little Man. It's also making sure we have safety procedures in place for the girls should life (or things on the schedule) be too overwhelming.
But! In this silence, I've been writing on paper. Not just writing, but practicing. I got Mastering Copperplate in the mail, along with a nibbed pen and ink. I've been practicing strokes and putting them together to form shaky letters. It's complicated enough that I don't think about strategies, but simple enough that I can supervise my girls playing play-dough or dolls.
This script is kind of like our life. When S and I first got married we knew some of the basic strokes of relationships and family, and we got to practice them before adding more complex elements. Once Buddy was added to the mix with had more things to practice, but there was also a healthy dose of play and give. With both of the girls we added more and more facets and possibilities, making our family even more challenging, but stunning and worth the work. As our family grows (in stature, not in number), the basics are down, the foundation mostly solid (though we do have to go back and practice things like communications), and God is the master penman of our family - adding the flourishes and complexities that, while dazzling to look at, are intricate and painstaking.
I can't wait to see what all of this silence adds up to.
xo,
J
soli deo gloria
Here's some of the process:
Monday, October 5, 2015
What Love Looks Like
Over the last few weeks, S and I have encountered what we have deemed to be in the top 3 of our worst weeks of our married life. The nutshell version : we're coming to realize the severity of Buddy's needs, and how that looks physically, emotionally, and mentally.
For me, it has put me in an ultra vulnerable place where taking the next breath almost requires thought. This take-my-breath-away realizing is on-going and brutal. It has forced us to our knees with only groans for prayers.
It has also made us stop sugar-coating to make it seem better in our own minds. With this lack of sugar comes the ability to be honest and ask for help. It is hard to ask for help. To admit that you cannot handle something on your own...ugh. So hard.
This week, we talked to other people about what was going on, and the overwhelming response of wanting to know specifics of how to help...has also been breath taking. It also has deepened my understanding of what love looks like.
Today, love looks like:
- a meal cooked for us and delivered with paper plates, so we have no dishes to worry about
- a husband stopping just because, and carrying a latte in his hand, just for me!
- flowers in a mason jar
- life-giving, perspective enhancing phone calls with 'aunties'
- knowing people are praying specifically for us
Love is so much more than that, really, but God has been opening my eyes to how He works through His Body to shower us with love.
Have you felt love lately?
XO,
J
soli deo gloria
For me, it has put me in an ultra vulnerable place where taking the next breath almost requires thought. This take-my-breath-away realizing is on-going and brutal. It has forced us to our knees with only groans for prayers.
It has also made us stop sugar-coating to make it seem better in our own minds. With this lack of sugar comes the ability to be honest and ask for help. It is hard to ask for help. To admit that you cannot handle something on your own...ugh. So hard.
This week, we talked to other people about what was going on, and the overwhelming response of wanting to know specifics of how to help...has also been breath taking. It also has deepened my understanding of what love looks like.
Today, love looks like:
- a meal cooked for us and delivered with paper plates, so we have no dishes to worry about
- a husband stopping just because, and carrying a latte in his hand, just for me!
- flowers in a mason jar
- life-giving, perspective enhancing phone calls with 'aunties'
- knowing people are praying specifically for us
Love is so much more than that, really, but God has been opening my eyes to how He works through His Body to shower us with love.
Have you felt love lately?
XO,
J
soli deo gloria
Saturday, August 29, 2015
September planning
In the advent of autumn, I have always reveled in the new stationary items that flood the house - whether they were bought for me, or now for my kids. I love the feel of fresh colored pencils (or pencil crayons, depending on your nationality), or the waxy smell of crayons, or even the potential of all those lovely blank notebook pages!!
This year, as Buddy gets all of his gear in order, I have ordered a special item for myself. This item, though, requires a tiny bit of a back story:
I have finished my 52 book resolution! As it is not even September, I have decided to take on another self-improvement style resolution : improving my handwriting/learn calligraphy. This is kind of an open ended resolution, but, I am resolving, nonetheless.
This resolution came directly out of being inspired by a video that's been floating around the internet which a friend of mine tagged for me to watch. It's incredible....and here it is : here . I LOVE his talking about how writing things down engraves things in our brains. It also struck a chord with me in that, I really am failing in my other resolution of memorizing James. I have the first chapter done, and am about 10 verses in to the second, but I don't know if I'll be able to get through the other 2 and 3/4 chapters by December if I don't switch up my method.
SO! Back to my special purchase! I ordered myself a beginner fountain pen! It's a gorgeous Faber-Castell Loom - which, according to the research I've done, is the best quality for people who are just getting into the art. There are others out there, but they have some pitfalls that this one seems to not have. Hooray!
I also got the book Mastering Copperplate Calligraphy!
With practicing my handwriting, I've already started - I've been copying out James, and then doing it from memory. Once a day (or every other day) I write out the verses I'm working on, and then once a week, I do all of the ones I have to keep them solidly in my brain. It's SO awesome. Two birds, one stone!
What are your plans for the fall?
XO,
J
Soli Deo Gloria!
This year, as Buddy gets all of his gear in order, I have ordered a special item for myself. This item, though, requires a tiny bit of a back story:
I have finished my 52 book resolution! As it is not even September, I have decided to take on another self-improvement style resolution : improving my handwriting/learn calligraphy. This is kind of an open ended resolution, but, I am resolving, nonetheless.
This resolution came directly out of being inspired by a video that's been floating around the internet which a friend of mine tagged for me to watch. It's incredible....and here it is : here . I LOVE his talking about how writing things down engraves things in our brains. It also struck a chord with me in that, I really am failing in my other resolution of memorizing James. I have the first chapter done, and am about 10 verses in to the second, but I don't know if I'll be able to get through the other 2 and 3/4 chapters by December if I don't switch up my method.
SO! Back to my special purchase! I ordered myself a beginner fountain pen! It's a gorgeous Faber-Castell Loom - which, according to the research I've done, is the best quality for people who are just getting into the art. There are others out there, but they have some pitfalls that this one seems to not have. Hooray!
I also got the book Mastering Copperplate Calligraphy!
With practicing my handwriting, I've already started - I've been copying out James, and then doing it from memory. Once a day (or every other day) I write out the verses I'm working on, and then once a week, I do all of the ones I have to keep them solidly in my brain. It's SO awesome. Two birds, one stone!
What are your plans for the fall?
XO,
J
Soli Deo Gloria!
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