The truth is, I have very little to say that isn't directly linked to how our family is being affected by Buddy's neuro-atypicalness. It's not that I'm completely inward focused, though that is a daily battle, it's more that it is so all-encompasing that it is what my mind focuses on even in 'down' times.
It's things like making sure I have the correct things on our visual schedule, and hoping even those things aren't too much for sensory-sensitive little Man. It's also making sure we have safety procedures in place for the girls should life (or things on the schedule) be too overwhelming.
But! In this silence, I've been writing on paper. Not just writing, but practicing. I got Mastering Copperplate in the mail, along with a nibbed pen and ink. I've been practicing strokes and putting them together to form shaky letters. It's complicated enough that I don't think about strategies, but simple enough that I can supervise my girls playing play-dough or dolls.
This script is kind of like our life. When S and I first got married we knew some of the basic strokes of relationships and family, and we got to practice them before adding more complex elements. Once Buddy was added to the mix with had more things to practice, but there was also a healthy dose of play and give. With both of the girls we added more and more facets and possibilities, making our family even more challenging, but stunning and worth the work. As our family grows (in stature, not in number), the basics are down, the foundation mostly solid (though we do have to go back and practice things like communications), and God is the master penman of our family - adding the flourishes and complexities that, while dazzling to look at, are intricate and painstaking.
I can't wait to see what all of this silence adds up to.
xo,
J
soli deo gloria
Here's some of the process:
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